Like many of you, I’ve been following the Stanford Rape case very closely. To say that as a human being I am disgusted by the end result would be an understatement.
Brock Turner, after unanimously being convicted of rape, has been sentenced to 6 months in jail and expected to be out in as little as 3 months for good behavior and positive character references. Because, in the words of the judge, a longer sentence would have a severe impact on him. Why Why WHY are we concerned with the impact punishment will have on the RAPIST???? What about the severe impact that young woman has endured and will continue to endure? Trust me, no matter how hard you try, you can never make the pain, humiliation, and traumatic feeling of being raped disappear. You can’t bury it. It will always be with you. Over time you learn to cope with it. You learn to accept it as part of you and move forward. But it never goes away.
Even in today’s article on theguardian.com regarding Turner’s father’s statement that his son should not go to jail for “20 minutes of action,” introduces Brock Turner as “a former swimmer at Stanford University.” The media is still painting Turner in a soft light when the only description that should be attached to his name is rapist. It doesn’t matter if he was a collegiate swimmer, a ballerina, or an expert mathematician. His swim times do not matter. His character before that night does not matter. How long he raped that woman does not matter. What matters is he did it. What matters is he was unanimously convicted. What matters is this young woman was continuously revictimized and had to relive that trauma over and over in court while being picked apart for being intoxicated and making poor decisions. But she didn’t decide to be raped behind a dumpster. Brock Turner decided that.
And instead of the judge and the probation officer looking at the facts and the evidence and the witness statements. They look at Brock Turner. And the promising future he once had. And the swimming scholarship that got taken away. And how his life will never be the same labeled as a sex offender. His father stating to the court that his son “will never be his happy go lucky self with that easy going personality and welcoming smile. His every waking minute is consumed with worry, anxiety, fear, and depression.” He went on to defend his statement saying college students needed to be educated about the dangers of alcohol and binge drinking and its “unfortunate results.”
Unfortunate results? Is that what we’re calling this? Brock Turner raped that woman. Alcohol didn’t rape that woman. Brock Turner did. There are millions of college aged students binge drinking on any given night that don’t rape women. This is not an issue of alcohol awareness. This is an issue of sexual assault. This is an issue of a privileged young man who isn’t used to ever having to take responsibility for his actions. This is a societal issue of rape culture. This is a huge flaw in the system that does not hold everyone accountable to the same standards. This is an issue that spreads far beyond this one case plastered all over the media.
Unfortunately, this young woman isn’t alone. She just happens to be at the center of this widely publicized case. And I think it’s noteworthy that we continue to praise her for her bravery and the eloquent way in which she addressed the court in her victim impact letter. It was so incredibly brave of her to do. She could have gone about it a million different ways but she chose to make herself vulnerable yet again, and courageously talk through everything she felt and experienced from her rape all the way through the trial. And she did it with poise. She could have been vulgar. She could have been disrespectful. She could have stooped to his level. But she did not. To go through that trial day after day and relive that trauma must have been excruciating. To see her attacker every day. To face him in court. To share all those private details. To have her character degraded and slandered unnecessarily. To hear the ridiculous sentence be handed out and still have the courage to stand up and address him and the court is awe inspiring. That is true bravery.
As a rape survivor, I’m boiling with rage, sadness, and an overwhelming disappointment in the justice system. Will a case like this deter others from coming forward after they’re assaulted? Will more people look to play the victim as the attacker? What is going on in our society that we are making excuses for those who commit crimes? Why does the victim in this case seem to matter less than the attacker, who over and over again is portrayed as this upper white class citizen with a promising future. What about the young woman’s future? Hasn’t anyone in the media stopped to think about her promising future before she was so terribly traumatized that she couldn’t even get out of bed to go to work anymore? I’m enraged. I’m saddened. And I feel for this young woman. I really do. Because unless you have been a victim of rape, you cannot fully understand the impact it has. You can read about it in text books. You can listen to survivor stories. You can make educational assumptions based on basic psychology. But you can never truly know. But I know. I know all too well about the nightmares. The panic attacks. The anxiety that suffocates you when you’re alone. Or in crowds. Or smell the same smells. Or see the same sights. It doesn’t just last 20 minutes. I can’t decide that I’ve been haunted enough by it for it to all go away now. It’s there. Always. Somewhere in the back of my mind. But I’ve been fortunate enough to learn to take control of it. To twist the pain and hardship it has caused and use it. To empower me, and to empower others. I admire this young woman because she found that courage a lot sooner than I ever did. I admire her strength and the way she took back her dignity. I admire her for being the voice many girls needed to hear. To the young woman at the center of all this, I hope you know that you are a hero to many.